Dating sucks. Truly and surely.

Streetsweep, if I win the lottery, I will buy you a plane ticket to come to Springfield. After I set up the fest ticket scholarship fund, that is. :)


Back to dating... I did the dating thing in my 20s, where there was a big lesbian community and everyone I dated had dated everyone else, and my ex set me up with my currents and vice versa. Dating really sucks. Now that I am an old lady of 42, and having not too long ago gotten out of an almost ten year relationship that should have ended a few years ago, I just made a pledge to not date at all... just be single and have friends. Ignore the whole thing.

Worked great. Except I fell in love. Oh well, the universe likes to snub its nose at people who say "never."

Do whatever works best and most naturally for you, Trixie. It will feel pretty effortless if it is the right thing. :)

TRUE THAT. Both relationships I've been in happened after I said screw it! lol

I WAS messaging like 4 different people a week on okcupid and then after things didn't work out with hottie Butch Swagger (who I met at the bar lol), I was kind of meh about the whole thing. I didn't message anyone for weeks and then last week I read a profile I KNOW I had looked at before, but apparently I never messaged her...so I did. She just sounded too cool to pass up lol. I'm glad I did because now we have a date on Saturday and I am SUPER EXCITED. I don't want to jinx anything but we have so much in common it's stupid...and she has her shit together (so important!)...and she's super cute lol AND she's never been to fest but she's wanted to for years. FESTIE VIRGIN!!! lol

Anywho, I'm glad you're all here to share my trials and tribulations with me lol <3

OMG I JUST REALIZED MY POST COUNT IS AT 1571! WHAT HAPPENED!?! I WAS AT OR OVER 4000!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

1. Howdy, been a lurker lately and not posting.
2. Maine passed marriage equality and Thanksgiving in front of my entire family C. proposed.
3. I was crying so hard I almost forgot to say yes,
4. One of the sweet things was my 10 year old grandson was crying, too.
5. The next day we left for a brief 25th anniversary trip in Quebec, which was romantic and felt like our first date the whole time.
6. We had rings from our Vermont civil union in 2000 so C. had silver bracelets designed by she and a crafts woman at Fest this summer made and sent to her.
7. I am old enough to remember the bad stuff that happened all the time to lesbians, and the fear of being found out (solved that fear for myself by coming out and staying out) back in the 70s. To have this much change in my lifetime amazes me.
8. I love my family, my friends, my home town who have loved and supported us these many years.
9. I love my daughter who has been an advocate all these years. When she was about 8 I asked her if it bothered her to have lesbian moms. She said, "no, I bothers me that there is discrimination against my moms."
10. Most of all, I love my beloved C., best friend and lover, my heart's home, who makes life as I know it possible.

AWWWWWW Belz! yay! <3 <3 <3

oh right, the original reason I logged on LOL

The date was AWESOME. She is so amazing in pretty much every way. HOWEVER she is so not the "type" I normally go for...she isn't fat (she's kind of athletic skinny) and she has blonde hair and she is not butch. Like I would say she is about as femme-y as me, maybe a bit more androgynous. But seriously, so awesome. I'm going to ask her out again :) :) :)

This first random is sort of "clutter waiting for a home." Please tell me if there's a better place on the board to post this?

I'm trying to get my cats from Utah to Wisconsin. If I can find a festie driving through SLC on their way to Fest, I would like to pay them half their gas money for the eastbound trip to go pick up my cats near Salt Lake City, Utah, and bring them to us--we could pick them up along I-80, somewhere convenient between Dubuque and Chicago. If you know of anyone, or are driving out yourself, please email me / have them email me at wolf dot kathlean at gmail dot com.

Moving past clutter and into life:

1. My daughter is living with me, and she is wonderful. (She had lived with her father for the past 4 years.) She had her 19th birthday in November. Are all 19 year-olds as sweet as she is?

2. She has been taking care of her disabled father all through High School, and NOT learning many important life-skills. How to cook. How to clean a bathroom and kitchen and a house. How to shop for food, how to shop for clothes. How to enroll herself in college, how to fill out a job application.

3. There is more to life than the DRIVEN life of work and constant production. Her work right now is to get where she needs to go next. How many of us could have used that sort of self-organizing pause after High School?

4. Last night we went on a baking-spree. Banana bread; accomplished. Bread; oh, yeah, I gotta go flip the bread into a bread-cloth! Be right back ... okay, done. Pumpkin pie from a real pumpkin; just need some evaporated milk. Today we're going to pick up where we left off, roast up some potatoes and carrots, make a butternut-squash soup, finish the pumpkin pie, bake the bread that's been slow-rising all night.

5. Moving again, February 1st, this time to a place that I do not anticipate having to move out of, barring loud noise issues. We can have cats. It's directly across from one of my favorite parks in Madison and near a lot of neat little shops, including a book store, hardware store, and the LIBRARY.

6. It's going to be expensive to get my kitties! Unless I get a Festie to help out, best-case scenario is about $600, which I do not have. I hope they are okay when I get them. I miss my little gray tabby.

7. Still thinking it will be two or three more years before I can go to Fest again. For a while there, I didn't envision going back; now it's starting to call my name again.

8. We had our final bat count for the season last weekend. Went up north about 2 hours, counted bats in an old train tunnel that's been turned into part of a popular bike path. Counted 581 bats. They're so cute and interesting! Tiny little things, small as mice. Not related to mice, by the way, anymore than a coyote is related to a deer--all they share is size.

9. My sawhorses are going to become our kitchen table when we move. Good place to put them until I have a workshop again!

Sufficiently random? Thanks for being here, wimmin. It has been too long since I've poked my head in to see how you are all doing.

-Red, just in case you may be interested, Baylor vs Tenn this Tuesday night on ESPN (go Vols and coach Warlick! please keep up the 100% player graduation tradition)
-Nef, i saw your daughter is playing the beautiful game of BB. Hope she enjoys it.

1. Ooooh Wrinkles I was just going to tell you not to watch, it is horrible. I am so sad. These days I just want to see someone play well against Baylor.

2. While I am happy about retiring I have some down days, or moments. Today I had a down moment, but it passed, 80 days and I have a very open schedule.

3. Trixie good for you! Going against "type' and everything.

4. Congrats Belzmom, you lead a romantic life.

5 . I have enough flexion to ride a bike. Once the swelling stops (in about four months) I will have a better idea about how much I can do, until then bend, bend, bend and bend more. And ice is my friend.

6 . So if you are in the South West Missouri area on January 5th stop by for some festie love.

7. Actually anytime you are in the SW MO area stop by for some festie love.

8. Unfortunately SW MO is the edge of the known universe, so understandably not much stopping by. Thus I frequently venture forth for festie events. Every so often though a party is held, usually when the wine rack gets full. The wine rack is full.

9. Since I am now the proud owner of a mini ipad I will be reading "Man Enough" soon.

10. Okay I just checked back on the game, thank all that you hold precious Tenn has scored. Wrinkles, nothing will ever be the same.

13. Everyday remembering and so glad I was priviledged.

wrinkles, for you I come out of lurkdom and you take the chance of getting me talking about my daughter and basketball. I forced her to join and she is really loving it so far. She has never played or seen a game, so really has no idea what to do. Dang Montessori schools kind of "drop the ball" so to speak when it comes to gym class. Her first game was Saturday and she was at the tip off (which I had previously explained) and her team mate tipped it right to her, where it hit her in the head and she went a bit gray for a second or two! She shook it off and ran down the court where she saw the action had commenced, and was able to laugh it off very well. We have been practicing at the local college, but they are closed for winter break now and I am considering actually paying for membership at the Y so we can keep practicing. I wish we had more friends, it is hard to teach her basketball with just the two of us.

HEY everyone, how about you come to Red's party Jan. 5? I'll be there and we shall have great fun!

Trixie, how is the dating going? UPDATE, please.

Belzmom, I am so happy for you and your family! Yours will be an epic wedding, I'm sure.

I'm racking up the fun, folks. It is just piling up in the next month or so.

I haven't gotten my grade in anatomy and physiology yet, but I earned a B+ in chemistry which is a very pleasant surprise! Squeaky wheels do truly get the grease. I'm expecting a B in A&P, unlikely to be surprised there.

Is it August yet?

Happee - I hope you can get your kitties to you safely (and cheaply!) soon!

Red - bend bend bend!

Nef - yay chemistry! That stuff is HARD (so is anatomy!) YOU ROCK

DATING UPDATE (cause ya'll love me lol)
She was out of town last weekend so no date...although she said she would love to if she had been home...but worry not! The date is happening this Saturday! I'm giddy. It's stupid.

But seriously.

squeeeee!

-in my biased opinion, there simply is not enough womyn's basketball spoken off on this bb
-but i do feel for the hockey fan. i wish they would settle their strike as well
-Nef., glad to hear she is enjoying playing and it is important to practice, but if she might be looking for a instructive book on the game, Nancy Lieberman-Cline's "Basketball for Women: How to Become a Complete Player" is good and well written.
-Red, that game hurt and up next for the Vols is Stanford! But at least the beat-down supplied many teaching moments. The Bears sure look good, though (including the stylish coach). Maybe Uconn will give them a game.

- Wrinkles, oh Wrinkles dost thou not remember our troubles hence? Speak no more of this, lest we be cast as pirates of this beloved thread.

- yeah that said, I may actually find myself cheering for UCONN, unbelievable! Someone stop Baylor, please.

- what crew are you on? This is an open question to any crew reading, but most particularly W, since you communicate only here.

- Ooooo Trixie we are all excited for you and hope you bring a virgin to Fest this year.

- Speaking of, we need about 500 more tickets sold then last year. So, everyone come home, it is most definitely reunion time.

- pride cometh before the fall or some such thing. A lesson I am learning as I lumber through these last days before retirement. I am grateful to learn it, who wants to be obnoxious, not me.

- Beth thanks for writing such an entertaining book!

- I do not care much for bananas, shocking and pretty damn boring. But I am being a good little do bee and eating them to avoid the calf cramps. Ever since I popped that meniscus in May that calf has been frantic.

Okay that is all I got, except to say it is a good thing, remembering.

I posted a whole long thing about festies, then accidentally just deleted all of it. My number one top fest related excitement in meeting a bunch of festies in the next couple of weeks at various stops along my route. You are all awesome and I can't wait.

So, though I am ready for August, and longing for the land, I am going to get a whole lot of in person woo over the next couple of weeks. Can't wait to see/meet all of you! :)

-Red, i don't mind stirring it up a bit. Plus, if womyn only talk about the festival here, then it begins to look and sound like a cult (I miss the inter-mixing of topics which use to be in the forums. It really demonstrated the diversity of interests, talents and humor of the gals who attend.)
-Besides, the lurkers need SOMETHING to read about. If they simply refuse to post their own topics, then why not womyn's hoops on occasion?
-root for Uconn!? no, no, no, no, no......well, if you must. (Actually, if my team isn't playing, yes, what i want to see is a competitive game. But Coach A to me is beyond the pale. The man thinks they should lower the hoops in the womyn's game, as if it's not perhaps better basketball precisely because it's more team oriented and not all about showboating and above-the-rim play.)
-Actually, i did not apply this fall. There are health issues in my family and i want to see what's up next spring. (Also, 10 years straight, for me, doing the same thing over vacation is a long time, so a break might be refreshing as well.) If the situation looks ok in May, then maybe i'll apply late and hope for the best, but i didn't want to submit early and end-up cancelling on them (Too much of that want on last year in my opinion, though there were some excellent late invitation workers added because of it! Are you on shuttle again?) If not there in 2013, it will def. be the people I will miss the most. (and also the annual respite from the news and technology)
- the topic of Facebook communication - now that would make for some fascinating social analysis.